I guess I just haven't had much to say lately. Been working on our profile and waiting for DCFS to give us the green light. Waiting on govt agencies to do what they are gonna do is nerve-wracking, to say the least.
The past couple weeks have been very hard on Carl, as his mother has learned she has breast cancer. Between concern for his mother and anxiety over DCFS, the poor man has been majorly stressed out. We went down to St. Louis last weekend to be with Peggy when she got her results and, yes...it's cancer. We are on the edge of our seats now as they do further testing and she has surgery coming up. It's sad to me how hard it is for them to talk about this. Both are trying to be so brave for the other one and pretend it's no big deal. It's hard for me to cope with that since, as you all know, I am the opposite. I scream, I cry, I cling to those I love when I am going thru something awful like this. Of course, I realize that everyone copes in their own way and no one way is better than the other, but I really do wish sometimes that Carl would just have a good screaming, crying outburst and get it out of his system. He wears his grief like a blanket and thinks he's hiding it under there when, in reality, I'm the one who has to look at it all the time and feels helpless because I cannot take it from him.
See? There, I'm doing it. I feel upset, so I pour it out. I'm crying and you know what? It feels good. If he can't cry, I will cry for him.
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2 comments:
Caryl, sorry to hear about your MIL. I pray that she will be cured of her cancer. I've been wondering where you've been. Sorry I have not called. I will find some time when we can talk uninterrupted. Give my love to Carl.
sorry to hear about peggy. Did you and Carl know joan mashiopinto had Ca of the breast a long while ago?
sometimes it helps to know that others have beaten an illness you have.
When MaMo found out she had ca of the cervix she said"this is going to be the hardest fight of my life and I need all the help I can get." As you know she died 45 years later and not from Ca.
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