Well, at LAST, our Foster license from DCFS has arrived. So much money and fuss for a flimsy 5 x 7 piecce of paper with our names and seal of the state of Illinois on it??! I guess I was expecting a parade, balloons, elephants and dancing midgets or something, I don't know...it was kind of anti-climactic that a small, flimsy piece of goverment form with our names clumsily typed in the appropriate slots was all that arrived after all the fuss.
And I must confess that I'm sort of angry that it took weeks and weeks and weeks for such a simple, stupid little thing. And, if ONE more person mentions how unfair it is that 14 year olds can simply have sex and have all the babies they want and Carl and I need a license to be parents I swear, I'm going to deck them!
Carl is perplexed and frustrated that I'm not over the moon happy about this license FINALLY arriving...and, I must confess, so am I. I mean, I'm glad it's here, but I'm pissed off that the whole process was so friggin slow and so invasive....for what? I worked extremely high security clearance for the goverment for years...it only took them 1 week to do my background check. WHY did it take Bethany months and months for this thing? The slower they move, the longer it takes me to bring a child into my home! I'm 40 years old! I don't have time to f around!
I'm beginning to get the idea that the closer I get to my goal, the more anxious and frustrated I may become. But, that's ok...it's an emotional and stressful thing to go through.
ALSO
Please pray for Carl's mom, Peggy. She has breast cancer and is having a double mastectomy tomorrow (Monday). Carl is driving down to be with her when she comes out of surgery. He is beside himself with hurt and worry for his mother. Pray for me, too, that I can put aside my own emotions and be there for Carl and his mom.
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7 comments:
I will be praying for you all in the days weeks adn months ahead.
This is indeed a stressful time for you and events that you looked forward too can seem to pale in incomparison to your anticipation. Try to keep that in peerspective but most of all take care of yourself. Allow yourself the emotions that you have when you have them.
Love ya
We are praying for you and carl.
Carl, needs to be by his mother to give her emotinal support and to make sure in lhis mind everthing was done right.
Love ya
It's good to vent..that's what we are here for. Let it out here on your blog so you be with Carl and his Mom 100%. God loves you, he has a plan, be patient with him.
Besides, you worked for the government, you should know things move very slowly ;-0
Your continued prayer is greatly appreciated...unity in prayer is important. I am hopeful that very soon, God is going to bring us that little boy or girl that He means for us to have. In the meantime, I am learning patience and perserverance...2 things I have always, always struggled with. I know one thing for sure, THIS time, I'm not going to quit or turn back in frustration when things don't go my way in my time.
Carl left this evening to drive downstate to be with his mom. This is very important to him. I just wish he could open up and vent his pent up emotions. He holds things in and buries himself in work. That is his way of coping: work work work. There are worse ways to cope, that's for sure, but I wish for him that he could let it out and have a good cry, you know? I think this trip to be with his mom will be a good start toward a better understanding of his mom's health status and where she goes from here. The not knowing is driving Carl crazy with worry.
OH you will need that patience when you get your child ;-0
Your only 40 geeez I had Clay when I was 44, just plan on being tired (ask Charyn) so restup!
Oh, thanks a LOT, Caryn...YOU'RE tired and you're in great shape? I'm screwed then!
Oh it doesn't matter what shape your in. Your kids will learn how to BEAT you down or you'll both go down!
MAN they can really wear me out. BUT I love 'em.
If you get a girl remember Smantha is a typical girl very INSISTANT & PERSISTANT actually I love how she "works it out". I usually have to tell her "if you want to do it then your going to have to make it work with everything else around here" and by God she does it!
Get your rest sweetie.....GOD LOVE YA.
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